While the nation’s birth rate has declined since the economic downturn, an increasing number of new parents are giving their offspring the monikers of Wall Street titans and the companies they work for.
Even parents of young children are joining in by changing their children’s names.
Little Morgan Stanley, born Monday at Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago, is one of those children. His parents, Wanda and Robert Stanley of Chicago, said their families were upset with them for not naming their son after a relative but soon realized it would give the child a leg up on life.
“We want our son to grow up with all the advantages that we never had, like having the government bail him out when he makes a mistake,” Robert Stanley said. “We’re going to teach him that it’s wrong to steal from other people, but if he ever did we’d like for him to avoid going to jail.”
Wanda Stanley said the family’s surname made it easy to choose a name that would help their newborn son. She said despite having two incomes she and her husband, both teachers, might find it difficult to pay for their son’s education.
“College tuition is rising faster than inflation and has been for years. On top of that, we’ll probably see more cuts in higher education to pay for a millionaire tax cut or more corporate subsidies,” Wanda Stanley said. “If our son, Morgan Stanley, racks up a huge debt to pay for college it’ll be nice to know the government will step in.”
The Stanleys are not alone, according to the American Hospital Association. While there’s been a surge in Morgan Stanleys, particularly among those with the Stanley surname, other popular baby names include Charles Schwab, JP Morgan Chase and Booz Allen Hamilton.
“We’re going to call him Allen, at least until he turns 21,” said new dad Roger Hamilton of San Francisco. “Somehow calling our son ‘booze’ just had too many negative connotations, although maybe he’ll love it when he gets to college.”
Roger and his wife Brenda gave birth to their son in September and originally named him after a family member, but later changed their minds after reading about the Occupy Wall Street protests. They already have a two-year-old daughter and are considering changing her name to Wells Fargo or AIG.
Not only are parents choosing the names of well-known companies, there’s also been a surge of babies named after Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein, JP Morgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon and tea party financiers David and Charles Koch, co-founders of Koch Industries.
Dr. Zachary Ornstein, sociology professor at Northwestern University, said this trend was to be expected given the economic uncertainty and the desire for parents to give their child every advantage possible.
“Wall Street firms ran up huge amounts of debt through irresponsible trading. They even bet against their own customers and still were bailed out. The executives got huge bonuses and never went to jail,” Ornstein said. “Parents think the only way their kids have a chance of getting any help from Washington is if they have the right name. It’s not just about getting a free ride, it’s about power.”
Parents might not have to wait to see if this approach will work. Andrew Swinson, a Northwestern University senior, was facing more than $70,000 in student loans upon graduation. He changed his name to Goldman Sachs in August and since then, his famous name has gotten him out of several speeding tickets and a potential DUI charge.
“As soon as I changed my name I got a call from my congressman back home asking if regulation was killing me and if I needed any bailout money,” Goldman Sachs said. “Since then I got all my debts written off and I’m being subsidized by the Fed with low-interest loans. Having this name is like a license to print money and a get out of jail free card all in one.”
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