Juan Pierre’s throw to second base expected to arrive shortly

Despite persistent rumors to the contrary, White Sox officials confirmed on Thursday that they still expect left fielder Juan Pierre’s throw to second base to arrive shortly.

The team believes that the throw, which Pierre originally sent during the 4th inning of Tuesday’s game against the Oakland Athletics, is simply delayed in transit and will soon emerge from the outfield grass.

Speculation regarding the ball’s potential disappearance began hours after Tuesday’s game concluded, when White Sox second baseman Gordon Beckham was spotted squatting alone on the infield, presumably still waiting for the throw to arrive.

Juan Pierre’s throw from left field is currently suspected to be somewhere between Pierre and second basemen Gordon Beckham

Veteran infielder Omar Vizquel immediately addressed the rumors regarding the ball’s whereabouts.

“[Beckham] didn’t mean to trigger a controversy,” said Vizquel. “He’s a young guy who plays with great enthusiasm. That being said, he still has a lot to learn about the ins and outs of every day life in this league. For instance, when Juan Pierre throws a ball back to the infield, there’s no need to sit around all night waiting for it – it will show up when it shows up.”

While White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen was not available for coherent comment, General Manager Kenny Williams reiterated the club’s confidence that Pierre’s throw will arrive at second in the near future.

“Is it just me, or does it seem like we have this same conversation 15 times every summer?” asked an irritated Williams. “My answer is the same as it was last time, and the same as it will be next time: We have every reason to believe that Juan’s throw will eventually make its way to second base. Whether that’s as early as today or later on this week, I can’t tell you. But just to remind you again, he hasn’t lost a ball yet.”

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Chandler Growing up outside of Cleveland, Ohio, Chandler formed a youthful and lasting love for sports, politics, comedy and melted cheese (full disclosure). The Chicago Dope is where his four loves often converge. He hopes you think this site is as dope as he does.