Sarah Palin recovering from ego-ectomy and victimitis

Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin was in critical but stable condition following emergency surgery and hospitalization, in what her doctor said was directly related to the Jan. 8 shooting in Arizona. Dr. Gerry Billings, Palin’s surgeon at Providence Alaska Medical Center in Anchorage, Alaska, said Palin became ill on a flight back to her home state Sunday night.

Billings noted that Palin had been playing the victim ever since the Arizona shooting and this, coupled with a dangerously enlarged ego, was too much for her cranial cavity to handle. Palin was taken from the airport straight to the hospital, where she underwent a partial ego-ectomy and treatment for victimitis.

“Her chief medical doctor had been warning our former governor that she had an enlarged ego, yet she declined to step out of the limelight,” Billings said. “She was also hit with an extreme case of victimitis over the past few weeks and as we all know these affect the same area of the brain. This region was so swollen that frankly I’m surprised she was even able to function. Only her strong willpower and complete lack of self-awareness kept her alive this long.”

The target of the shooting, Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-Ariz.) was severely wounded while six others were killed and many others injured. While no link was made between the alleged shooter, Jared Loughner, and the heated rhetoric of the past two years, there were calls from many in politics and the media for an easing of the nation’s political tone.

Palin’s critics pointed to her use of bullseyes on a political map that included Giffords, along with Palin’s use of rhetoric such as “don’t retreat, reload” and her false claim that health care reform included “death panels” as being so outlandish that it could result in violence. Palin responded  by releasing a video in which she used the anti-Semitic term “blood libel” and accused her critics of trying to silence her.

In response to additional criticism from the video itself, Palin appeared on Sean Hannity’s show on Fox, where she found an ever-sympathetic ear.

“Let me tell ya Sean, asking me to tone down my rhetoric is the same as asking me to sit down and shut up and I’m going to fight these naysayers, you betcha,” Palin told Hannity last Thursday. “Despite being on Twitter, Facebook, my speaking engagements and appearances here on your show, I bet as much as two percent of Americans might be unaware of what I say tonight. I’m at such a risk of being silenced I can’t even speak to the real media anymore because they’ll hit me with actual questions. I can only talk to sycophants like you.”

Her husband Todd Palin recorded an interview with Hannity via satellite that is to be aired on Monday’s show. In an excerpt released to the media, Todd Palin said reporters were to blame for his wife’s ill health.

“Sarah has been playing the victim for so long, I figured her ego was indestructible. I guess even she shows weakness sometimes,” Todd Palin said. “She’s always had a strong spirit so I know she’ll pull through this, but we’d all appreciate it if you’d all stop praying for Congresswoman Giffords and start praying for the real victim of the Arizona tragedy—my lovely wife Sarah.”

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