Frito-Lay introduces single-parent family size chips

Broken families across the nation celebrated last week when Frito-Lay unveiled its newest product: Single-Parent Family Size Tostitos®.

Larger than a standard-size bag, but smaller than a family-size container, Single-Parent Family Size Tostitos® is the first food product specifically marketed to families of divorce.

“For decades, single-parent families have been a huge demographic. They deserve their snacks to have the same freshness that real families enjoy.” TJ Martin, Marketing Director for Frito-Lay, said. “The introduction of this size has been long overdue.”

When asked why it took so many years for a product like this to come on the market, Martin said that many industries have ignored single-parent families because of the stigma of divorce.

“When we introduced single-serving sized portions back in the early ‘80s, we faced a lot of scrutiny,” Martin said. “Suddenly, people started putting off marriage until later in life and Frito-Lay took the blame.”

Some believe the new Tostitos will have a similar effect on society. Jake Harrington, a representative of the Chicago Christian Coalition believes the product will encourage divorce.

“This is blasphemy,” Harrington said. “Frito-Lay’s repulsive catering to dysfunctional families is sending a message that it’s all right to give up on your marriage.”

As a result, Harrington’s congregation is boycotting all Frito-Lay products and urges “every decent, upstanding citizen of this beautiful country to do the same.”

“I attend a lot of church socials and when it comes time to shop for tortilla chips, we’ll be looking elsewhere,” Harrington said.

The boycott has not affected sales and Frito-Lay has no plans to halt production of the controversial chips. The company has begun airing a series of ads starring newly single parent, Kate Gosselin, and sales are through the roof.

Martin sees this as a sign to create more products geared to individual subcultures.

“We want to make snacks that meet everyone’s needs,” Martin said. “So in 2010, we’ll be introducing ‘I Have Two Dads’ flavored Doritos and ‘Flaming Hot Transgendered Cheetos.’”

The preceding article was originally published on The Daily Blank.

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